CAUTION: My articles are generalized and not meant for any particular or specific situation. Taking my well thought out opinions personally may cause anger, sadness, loss of sleep, or bitterness.
Results may vary!
Throughout my life, I’ve been involved with a female who either is in a relationship or just getting out of one. There is one problem that continues to occur. Her (ex) boyfriend has a problem with me because I'm either cool or involved with “his” woman.
This topic is completely free of gender bias because people of both genders are known for doing this.
It is very common for a person to cheat. It’s not right, but it is common. And it’s natural for people to move on after the end of a relationship. However, problems arrise when the previous flame (or in the case of cheating, current flame) gets involved and approaches the new flame and gives them all the blame without evaluating themselves or their significant other.
I find this troubling because if your mate leaves you for someone else, it may be fair nto say that there is a problem with you, and maybe you need to improve. If you were doing everything right, there would have been no reason to leave. Unless your partner just wasn't ready to settle down, in which case, there really isn't much you could have done. Either way, there is no point for you (the victim) to go after your old partners new flame as the new flame did nothing wrong to you.
If your partner cheats, you just need to think about that relationship and ask yourself, "Do I really want to be with someone who would cheat on me?" I hope the answer is no. Most likely the person your old flame is cheating on you with doesn't know you. It isn't personal. Therefore, there is no reason to approach or blame them.
NOW, there is an acceptable time for you to approach the new flame. If that flame just happens to be a "friend" that ruins your relationship purposely to steal your mate.
In conclusion, if your significant other is involved with someone new, there's no need to place blame or attack the new flame. In cases of an ex those feelings must simply be contained and you must recognize that you lost that battle. If your partner is cheating, you're still not granted the right to blame the person that's being cheated with. After all, he/she has NO attachment to you and can't be held fully responsible. That situation is the fault of your partner at which point you need to take it up with him/her and re-evaluate your relationship.
Happy Holidays,
Cornbread
P.S. If you want to ask me a specific question, just leave a comment and I’ll try to get back to you. The easiest and most direct way to contact me is through Twitter. Follow me (@FredE_Cornbread and @31percent.
